noticeable

 

big days in this year feel different. anniv papa mama (in hijriah) bersamaan dengan ulang tahun cucunya yang ke-3. and i have my 30 also with many things to be grateful for.

my parents was getting merried in arafah day, so they will always said there are 2 anniv dates in a year. and on that day this year, bais is turned three. so my parents looked really happy with video call in the morning and mini tumpeng for breakfasting meskipun cucu dan mama papanya lagi sibuk jadi belum mampir.

surrounding with much love from closest family is priceless and i cant enough grateful for this. i learned a lot from the way mom and dad raising kids. mom had pregnancy in the late age, two kids in a row. and i was born when my dad was out of the town. and she took care of us while she also had job.  

and i've learned life values from them, that help me through my adulting life. and somehow it  guides me reduce problems that potential to be happened as i grow.

but, still, i dont know whether i am ever really sure with my decision in life. i mean as i getting older, adult problems are real and it is around, faced by people that i know in person. domestic violance, life insecurities, a boring marriage life, not having life purpose, cheating,vtoxic relationship. i mean there are many problems in life, but live it together with the wrong person just make it worse. and i dont know will i ever brave enough to take the risk, will i ever regret to not brave enough to take the risk.

and as tiny wisdom said in their post about turning thirty

Adulting means not knowing what you’re doing, but you have to do it

And you may never fully understand why or how things happened

but i wish everything will be fine, always.

best,

ayu